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BEACON Senior News - Western Colorado

Senior dating tips

Jan 27, 2023 10:13AM ● By Michael Murphy

Recently, I saw an ad on my phone for a senior dating service. I honestly didn’t know such a thing existed. But being a curious guy, and with Valentine’s Day coming up, I decided to check out a number of online dating sites.

First off, my interest in senior online dating sites is strictly scholarly. I am not having any problems in my marriage—at least, my wife hasn’t told me about any major ones.

I was surprised at the scale of the burgeoning senior dating industry. One reason for its popularity as explained by Shannon Lundgren, a professional matchmaker, is that “Dating apps present an almost overwhelming opportunity to meet new people. It’s like putting a bunch of fishing lines into a pond. You don’t know which line might bite.”

Well, I would say it all depends on the “bait.” 

The initial big decision is whether or not you want to schedule a first date with a specific person listed on the site. If you compare the ways that older men approach this to how women handle it, there are some pretty clear differences.

For many men it’s like trick-or-treating. For example, a man might respond to a picture in a woman’s posting like this: “You’re pretty cute; let’s get together.” And he might repeat that reaction to a hundred different women without having actually read any of their profiles.

Whereas, women tend to carefully read what male candidates have to say. Once they have narrowed their list, they may go a step further and search them up on Facebook, LinkedIn, etc. They may even discuss their options with close friends before deciding.

Come to think of it, the contrast in the behavior of these “mature” men and women is quite similar to that of the teenage boys and girls in my high school classes I taught!

Once you’ve chosen someone to date, most senior dating sites have suggestions on how to prepare for the big event, including:

Rediscover your inner glow. I’m not really sure what this is or if I ever had it to begin with. But if it’s anything like indigestion, I’ve got it covered.

Make a list of what you love about your body. This one is tough. However, I do take great pride in, and am very protective of, the three hairs remaining on my head.

Have three “go to” dating outfits in your closet. All set here, except I have a heck of a time choosing between my red, green or brown flannel shirts.

Always take a bath or shower before your outing. Dang! This is turning out to be more work than I expected.

Seniors have numerous options on where to go for the first date. Restaurants and coffee houses appear to be the most popular spots, with the XXX aisle of a video store far down on the list.

While out on the first date, one site noted that nerves can result in terse conversations, such as:

Him: How’s your salad?

Her: Good. And yours?

Him: Yeah, really good.

Personally, I see nothing wrong with that topic since it sounds exactly like something my wife and I discuss every time we go out to eat!

I guess that you could liven up the conversation by tossing out some more stirring starter questions such as: Who did you vote for in the last election? What went wrong between you and your ex? Have you ever had plastic surgery?

And if you are a man with a strong death wish: “Are you on a diet?” 

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