Dear Laird: It’s time to put Mom under professional care. Luckily, we have four facilities nearby. Most seem quite pleasant, except one. However, I’m struggling to understand what I should be looking for. Could you help by suggesting what questions I should be asking? Signed, Combing Through Care Centers

Dear Combing: It’s great that you’re beginning your search ahead of time. Many families delay until the need becomes urgent, which can lead to hasty decisions due to limited availability and waiting lists. Starting now, when you can deliberate carefully, is wise and tends to result in better choices.

Here are some important factors to consider when choosing a care facility for your mother.

First, assess her current and future needs. Determine if independent living is sufficient, or if she needs nursing or memory care. If your mother needs routine medical treatments or has a likelihood of falls, you will need to consider nursing care. Understand each facility’s protocol for handling emergencies, such as serious falls: Will they call an EMT or transfer her to a hospital emergency room?

Your travel time to the facility is more important than you might think. Proximity matters, especially in the initial stages after placement, when you may need to make multiple trips for additional items or to address any unforeseen needs. 

If the facility is too far, this could impact the frequency and quality of your visits. Regular interaction is crucial for your mom’s well-being. Being nearby allows for better personal care and can help alleviate any feelings of guilt on your part.

When evaluating care facilities, make several unannounced visits. While facilities often prefer scheduled visits, dropping in unexpectedly allows you to see how the staff interacts with residents during regular operations. Observe the cleanliness, the noise level and how residents are treated.

Take a moment to sit in the lobby and watch before approaching anyone. When you start to seriously consider a facility, plan visits at different times, including weekdays, evenings and weekends, to assess staffing, especially since fewer full-time staff may be working on weekends.

Be wary of the “chandelier effect.” Just like hotels, a facility will spend a lot of money on the lobbies to impress you. Focus instead on the cleanliness and upkeep throughout the facility. When touring the rooms, hallways and other residential areas, consider the needs and comfort of your mother, especially if she has dementia. Ensure the living spaces cater to her needs, not yours.

Costs are crucial when choosing a care facility. Focus on understanding not only the monthly fees but also any potential additional charges as your mother’s needs increase. Ask for a detailed fee schedule and check if you’ll be notified before any extra services are billed. It’s also wise to consult your regional Agency on Aging for financial guidance.

A comprehensive care plan is essential. Inquire about how the facility creates these plans and ensure you can contribute to the process. This plan should reflect your mom’s preferences and needs, including medication regimens and activities she enjoys. Verify how often the care plan is updated and ensure you have regular access for review and approval.

Maintain open communication with the facility through regular meetings, especially for memory care, where quarterly check-ins are standard. Always come prepared with a list of questions or concerns.

Remember, the learning doesn’t stop after placement; you can always seek better options if your needs or expectations aren’t met. Keep your mom’s best interests at heart, even if it means considering a change in facilities.