“We’ve only just begun to live. White lace and promises. A kiss for luck and we’re on our way." 

These lyrics by The Carpenters became a wedding anthem of the 1970s, capturing the hopes and dreams of newlyweds embarking on their new life together. Who doesn’t wish for a happy ending when a relationship is just beginning?

The tabloids are full of accolades for married couples like Chrissy Teigen and John Legend, married for 11 years, and Blake Lively and Ryan Reynolds, married 12 years.  Admirable as these milestones are, time will tell if their marriages remain solid through the decades—30, 40, 50 or even 60 years after saying “I do.” 

Carol and Lynn Wilkinson cut their wedding cake on November 17, 1962

Relationships evolve through stages: the honeymoon period is marked by passion and a desire for near-constant togetherness. Couples may revel in infatuation, but it takes intention to nurture that connection into something enduring.

The middle years often bring challenges: managing conflict, raising children and adapting to job changes. Intimacy might wane, complacency can creep in and doubts may arise. Questions like “Am I settling?” or “Is there another path?” can test the foundation of a marriage. Couples that survive these years often emerge with their vows of “for better, for worse” strengthened.

As children leave the nest and life slows down, the golden years of marriage offer stability and an opportunity to rediscover each other. Aging brings its own set of trials—mobility issues, illness or dementia—but couples who have weathered life’s storms often find renewed joy and fulfillment. These years are a chance to appreciate one another, develop new interests together and continue moving side by side.

A LIFE OF ADVENTURE

Throughout their 62 years of marriage, Carol and Lynn Wilkinson have built a partnership rooted in mutual trust, admiration and a shared sense of adventure. From sailing and trekking in Nepal to raising a family, their lives together have been anything but dull.

“We have become partners wanting and helping to achieve the best for each other,” said Lynn, 85.

The couple met on a blind date, and for Lynn, it was love at first sight. He fondly remembers Carol as “smiling, tall and beautiful,” qualities he quickly found were matched by her inner beauty. 

Carol, 83, values Lynn’s work ethic and honesty, attributes she says have helped them navigate life’s challenges as a team. 

“If you’re roughing it, you do learn about each other and you work together,” said Carol. “Trusting and showing appreciation for each other goes a long way toward smoothing out areas of disagreement.”

Phyllis and Tom Hurley renewed their vows in Bali, Indonesia on June 30, 2014.

Phyllis and Tom Hurley, who will soon celebrate 51 years of marriage, emphasize the importance of patience and intentionality. 

“When difficult times arrive, pause and give each other grace,” Phyllis, 80, advised.

Tom explained that setting shared goals has helped them maintain a meaningful connection. 

Each year, the Hurleys create a “goals board” to visualize their dreams and priorities, ensuring their time together remains purposeful. 

“We have made it a priority to learn each other’s dreams and desires and the activities and priorities that lead to a meaningful and fruitful marriage,” said Tom, 78. 

Other couples share similar insights into what keeps a marriage strong. 

Guy Nanney, 77, says respect is just as important as love in a lasting relationship. 

“Feeling that your partner is reliable, honest and capable allows you to always feel good about that individual,” he said.

He and his wife, Sharon, 79, have been married for 48 years and credit shared family values and aligned expectations for their success.

“Having very similar expectations of life from the beginning keeps there from being disappointments during your marriage,” Guy said.

COUNSEL FOR COUPLES

 A LEGACY OF LOVE

For some, enduring relationships are more than just personal milestones—they are part of a family legacy that shapes others’ understanding of commitment.

My parents were married for 70 years. They enjoyed being together, shared common interests and relished catching up after even brief times apart. They have both passed on, but I can still recall the lilt of their voices and soft laughter floating from the kitchen when they reconnected. They set a loving and stellar example for me and my husband, Ron, married 53 years.

Poet Robert Browning wisely penned, “Grow old along with me! The best is yet to be, the last of life, for which the first was made.”

REALTIONSHIP RX: WISDOM FOR LASTING LOVE