I’m no famous author or Instagram influencer, but I did something last year that made my life richer and more adventurous. The secret? I started saying “yes” more often. 

"Yes" to dinner with friends at Beaujo's Pizza in Denver

 The second half of 2024 was a hellacious year for me. I had an unexpected surgery, then a brutal case of COVID that kept me in bed for a week. Six weeks later, my husband, who was disabled, fell and hit his head. He suffered a brain injury that ultimately took his life. To say I was shell-shocked is an understatement.

On top of that, I am legally blind. I use a white cane, partly to help me navigate obstacles and tripping hazards and partly to signal to others that I may not see or recognize them clearly. Life was challenging, and in many ways, it still is.

A lot of people make resolutions at the start of a new year. Some of my younger friends choose a word or phrase, a sort of mantra to guide how they want to live. I wasn’t too keen on the whole “word of the year” idea until I paused and asked myself: If I did choose a word, what would it be?

 The answer came instantly: “Yes.” It felt so clear and so strong that it almost seemed to come from on high. So, I decided to own it: 2025 became my year of YES.

For me, saying yes wasn’t so much about cramming my calendar with activities as it was about overcoming fear, anxiety and trepidation. It was about overthinking less and remembering that if I try something and don’t enjoy it, nothing is lost. I can simply say yes to something different next time.

As the year went on, I noticed something about the times I usually would have said no. Often, I had already projected how the experience would go. If that imagined outcome wasn’t exactly what I wanted, I would decline. I began to see how perfectionism had been keeping me from good things.

"yes" to a new wool sweater and the EPIC museum in Dublin

 My low vision also played a role. Saying yes meant trusting that people would help when I needed it and being willing to ask when they didn’t. I’m still working on that.

But in 2025, I tried not to look too far ahead. If something sounded interesting or fun, I said yes.

I took the train alone to Denver and met up with longtime friends I hadn’t seen in years. It took careful planning since I can’t drive and I didn’t want to go broke using Uber. It also took humility to ask who might let me stay with them, go out for a meal together and help me get to my next destination. The trip was a success, and the confidence I gained, along with reconnecting with friends, was priceless.

"yes" to time with family in Puerto Vallarta for my son's birthday

 I also said yes to growth. I took part in three small-group studies that stretched me in different ways. One was a grief group that read a great book together. Another was a group of five women working through a video series on “Flourishing in the Third Third of Life.” The third was a women’s group discussing a book about evolving faith and how our own theologies have changed over our lifetimes. Each group gave me something valuable, and all of them reminded me how much I love reading and going deeper with people.

Early in the year, I was invited to a widows group. It has brought weekly dinners, crazy group texts, nights out at concerts, wineries and dancing, all wrapped in the kind of friendship that makes life feel full again. This may be one of my best yeses of 2025.

"Yes" to solo travels on Amtrak

I said yes through work, too. When I had the option to attend a team meeting virtually or in person, I took the train back to Denver. While it was a bit scary because I arrived after dark, people helped me navigate Union Station and taking an Uber to my hotel. The rest of the trip was filled with wonderful people who went out of their way to help me navigate doors and steps and identify food in the buffet line. 

One of the biggest things I said yes to was connecting with people in meaningful ways. Strong social ties are linked to longer, happier lives. I can attest to that! Sharing your life with friends, old or new, and taking a genuine interest in their stories makes your own life richer. 

That idea sparked another yes. After the Charlie Kirk murder and a lot of ugliness in public conversations, I felt the urge to do something that connected people instead of dividing them. I created “First Friday Fires,” held on the first Friday of every month in my driveway. I made signs, put them on my fence where people walk by on the way to the park and invited neighbors to bring a chair and their favorite beverage.

The first month, a retired couple came by, then a young couple joined us. The next month, it was mostly young people, including a guy I’d seen often while he walked a dog. Another couple stopped after a date, before picking up her parents at the airport. Last month, a man walked up and we realized we knew each other from a local writers group. Lo and behold, we’re neighbors. It has been a joy to meet people, start conversations, strengthen existing friendships and build new ones.

For me, saying yes wasn't so much about cramming my calendar with activities as it was about overcoming fear, anxiety and trepidation.

Saying yes doesn’t have to mean big, dramatic adventures. Sometimes it’s as simple as connecting with another human being. In the moment, it may not seem like much, but it can be the first step toward feeling known, loved and less alone in a world that can feel very large and unfamiliar.

Try saying yes a little more often. You may be surprised by the stories you’ll have to tell at the end of the year. 

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